Where the hell have I been?

WOW it has actually been so long since I blogged that I sign into Typepad to find out I have to learn it all over again..

Either the changes they have made are so drastic,, OR since becoming a mommy my brain has really acually turned to MUSH... I think the later is the actual..

 

Where do I begin? or RESTART.. I have felt so out of touch going thru the ONES TWOS and now coming up on the THREE's with my daughter.. that I feel it is time to start using my brain a little and acting instead of reacting..

Someone once told me when my daughter was a baby... "say goodbye to the first couple years of her life as far as yourself is concerned" my initial thought was YEAH WHATEVER... that is so outlandish... but NOW I KNOW... SHE COULDN'T OF BEEN MORE RIGHT ON THE MONEY...

I have focused these entire two years solely on her I have forgotten who I am and what I did... I used to blog everyday? NO WAY.. not me... I used to create things on a daily/weekly basis??? NO WAY not me... but YES that was me... and now I have to completely re-invent myself... what I had worked so hard for before has completely been erased.. matter of fact I am sure that I will be the only one reading this.... my readers have flown the coupe ....flew the coupe??..

Regardless.. I have to start somewhere... for the sake of my sanity I need to get my words and thoughts down SOMEWHERE...

Yes I have tried to actually journal with pen and paper.. but the minute I get my markers out.. the little is like "mommy I draw with your markers"...and I end up getting nothing down but a drawing animals from random to please that little princess.... which is such and oxy moron to me because when I first dreamt of having a little child from God... I couldn't imagine nothing cooler than journaling with my child... and now I only wish I could have a moment alone.... LOL

Don't get me wrong.. being a mother has been the most amazing experience I have ever had and I love my daughter more than words can say...

I just need to get back to having somewhat of an identity...somewhat of a release of this person I am now... AN OUTLET... 

So here I am POSTING AGAIN after years of poopy diapers.. I only hope I can stick to it and dedicate even a few minutes here..

If anyone is even reading this... thanks for your support... :)

Comments

[Joanne]

Hi Stacie! Glad to see you online again! I know exactly how you feel, not having time for yourself, this too shall pass. You'll get you own time, slowly but surely, a little at a time. Definately set up a little table in the 'art' room for Little and work together. Those will be more priceless times! One of these days she may not want much to do with you because you aren't 'cool' anymore. Her friends will take her life over. You will miss the days of creating together in the art room. Some of my fondest memories with my mother are times we drove around looking for interesting barns to draw and take photos of for later use, and creating together in the studio.
Anyway, glad to see that you are here again! Merry Christmas to Jeff, Audrey, yourself and your entire family. And HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Holy cow!!! 2011??? YIKES!
love, JOS
PS. I got a new dog. Her name is Lilly. ;-)

[Dawn]

Yay ~ So happy to see you making an attempt to get back into blogging and art-ing again, Stacie! I've checked in a few times hoping you were blogging, but I totally understand the demands of mommy-hood! Don't give up on the journaling idea, though. There's always times to sneak in such "luxuries" into your life ~ naptime, evenings etc. And, in the next few years, you'll be able to even journal together if you supply your budding artist with art supplies that are her very own.
But ultimately, remember that although these first few years seem incredibly exhausting at the time, they will pass oh so quickly! I know that because my babies are now 23 and 19!
Cheers ~
Dawn.

[Lisa]

Wow...so good to see you post. I was wondering how you were doing. It gets easier, but you always need to remember to make time for yourself. I think the thing I enjoy most is how creative my girls are now and I think it comes from watching me and sitting with me and making art.